A Television Saga....

The Englishman and I went out recently to purchase a new television.  My daughters will tell you I have a true love/hate relationships with the tv's in our house.  Yes, it is very nice to have a large tv with surround sound, the ability to record television programs on an automatic basis, access to British television shows, etc.  But sometimes, most especially when the Englishman is halfway around the world on a business trip, the girls have witnessed me at my wit's end shouting, "I just want an on/off switch.  That's all."  Because if I push the wrong buttons I can sometimes lose the picture entirely.  Then I have to wait days till the Englishman arrives home and can put it all back in order.  I have tried writing down a "cheat sheet" with all sorts of instructions as to what to do, but even that is of no help sometimes.

Despite this, when the Englishman suggested a new television for the living room I just smiled and said sure.  I trust his judgement on what to get and simply go along to help him get it in the car and then into the house.  Thank God for the flat screens of today.  It was a different story many years ago when we got our first really big tv....

I think it is instinctual for men to want to go forth from the home and provide for their families.  Back in the day, that would have required a shotgun or knife and maybe a wagon. Today they just need credit cards, a shopping cart, an SUV and access to a supermarket or store.  Whether it is providing food, shelter, or entertainment, I think men enjoy the feeling of having "brought home the bacon" or in this case, the television.

One Saturday morning, long, long ago, the Englishman arrived home from an outing and asked me to come outside to see what he had purchased. I obliged and he proudly pointed to the back of the station wagon which held a rather large wooden frame surrounding a rather large television.  A four hundred pound television! He was so pleased to tell me how it had taken three men, plus himself, to hoist it into the back of our station wagon.  I quickly looked around and inquired if he had brought these three men home with him. There was a pause....  Nope, apparently they had not come along.

So there we were, staring at the four hundred pound television lying in the back of the car, wondering what to do next.  The Englishman pointed out that on a positive note, there were wheels attached to said tv.  Ok, so that might get us to the front door area.  Then what?

You know how when you are in grammar school, and they are teaching you all kinds of what you think are useless bits of information and you wonder when in heaven's name are you ever gonna use it?  Well that day had arrived.  I suddenly remembered something about Fifth Grade Science and inclined planes...

Long story short - we got the tv out of the car, onto the driveway, and rolled it up to the front door.  Fortunately the Englishman had two large planks which we were able to use to roll the tv up over the two steps of the entrance and safely into the house.  The step down into the family room was a little heart stopping, but we finally reached its destination in the corner of the room.  Phew!  Mission accomplished.  I think the Englishman may have even mumbled something like, "See. No Problem." Hmmmm....

It's no surprise then, when the Englishman and I feel a twinge in our lower back or neck these days, that I start to feel gratitude for today's sleeker, lighter models of televisions.