Friday Foto....

During our weekly Sunday visit, M wanted to assist me in making some decorations for a Christmas tree I had put up in our dining room.  The Teacher in me thought quickly on her feet, grabbed some construction paper, stickers and ribbons.  Soon we had several ornaments with which to adorn the tree.

M was too excited to wait until our entire task was completed, so at first, whenever she finished adding the final touch of ribbon to her work, she would hurry off to the dining room to hang it on the tree.  I eventually convinced her to wait until we had them all finished, reassuring her she would be able to hang each and every one.  

I had a feeling about how it would all turn out....

Yes, all the decorations are in one area, all within a four year old's reach.

It's perfect.   I wouldn't change a thing.

It reminds me of a Christmas tree, thirty years ago, in my mother's house.

My father had passed away in early December that year, when our oldest was just one month shy of her third birthday and daughter #2 was but seven weeks old.

God bless my mother, despite her overwhelming despair at having just "lost my best friend", she insisted that Christmas needed to go on, especially for the little ones.  And that included decorating a tree.

Now my mother always prided herself on being the "supervisor" of the tree decorating each year - never hesitating to point out if there were too many ornaments in one spot, not enough lights over there, etc.  But that Christmas, she was totally "Grandma".  When she came into the living room and saw that her oldest granddaughter had placed at least a dozen ornaments on one branch, she clasped her hands and exclaimed that it was the most beautiful tree we had ever had.  I thought surely she might rearrange the ornaments after we left, but she never touched them.  Every time we came into the house that Christmas season she would remark on what a wonderful job my little one had done in helping with the tree.  I'll never forget that.

It also reminds me of that famous line from A Charlie Brown Christmas when Linus says,  "That's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown."

Thursday's Thought for the Day....

"There is so much love found in the touch of holding a grandchild's hand."

                                                            ~ author unknown

Today is a very special day - M's 4th birthday! 

It is also the fourth anniversary of the day I became "Grandmom" - M's name for me.

I frequently tell people that being a grandmother has turned out to be the most incredible experience. You suspect it will be fun and exciting.  But to my surprise, it is the most wonderful feeling, truly beyond what I imagined. 

Happy Birthday, my darling granddaughter!

May you always know how deeply you are loved and may you receive back ten fold all the love and joy you bring to us all!

Wednesday's wisdom....

I Can Do This!

People used to talk years ago about "playing tapes in your head" -  i.e. repeating certain words or phrases over and over, generally negative ones, to the point where you start to believe they are true. Things like, "I can't do that." or "Girls can't do that" or "I'll make such a mess of that". You get the picture.

I've come to learn over the years that I need to do two things.

One: Stop repeating those ridiculous statements!

Two: Admit that more often than not, it's more a case of "I don't want to do that" rather than "I can't do that."

My girls will tell you that our collective little mantra when they were growing up was:

We can do this!

And the more we said it, the truer it became.  

Tip for a Tuesday....

SAVE ~ SAVE ~ SAVE!

I've been doing nearly all my shopping online these days.

Saves my sanity and is far less stressful than battling the crowds and traffic.

My only concern?  Perhaps I was missing out on a sale or two, or the opportunity to use some coupons.

But I've made a wonderful discovery!

Each time I go online and place an order, before I finish the transaction I "google" or search to see if there might be some coupon codes - floating out there in cyberspace.

Today I found a 40% off code for a pair of gloves I had been in search of.  Hurray!

If you too are cruising the "superhighway" of shopping, before you press the final order button check to see if there are any coupons out there which will help you save a few bob.

You can also sign up on sites such as Coupon Mom, Retail Me Not and Ebates, to receive emails on special deals.

As Martha Stewart says, "It's a good thing."

Monday memory....

Back in the day....

Long before there was "online" shopping, there was catalog shopping.  I can recall the excitement as a child of perusing for hours the Sears Christmas catalog, making out my list for Santa.

When my own children were growing up, I discovered and relied heavily upon the Spiegel catalog.  There wasn't a store attached to it, like Sears, but they seemed to always have in stock items, especially of the toy nature, which seemed in short supply in our local shops.  Think Cabbage Patch dolls, back in the Eighties.

Unlike shoppers of today, my ordering took place over the telephone, not on a computer. After giving all the pertinent information to the Customer Service Representative, I simply waited for the items to arrive.

Via the iconic brown truck, with the friendly driver.

What a treasure my local UPS driver, Ted, turned out to be!  He was sort of the "Elf" that helped make Christmas one in which secrets and surprises were kept until little girls excitedly crowded around the tree on Christmas morning.

Ted liked to back his huge truck up our driveway, then toot the horn to let me know he had arrived with goodies.  Not only did this greeting summon whichever dog was currently residing under our roof, it often brought curious children to the window.  

Knowing this, Ted came up with a plan to deal with holiday deliveries.  He would wait until I raised the garage door and then look to see if there were little ones beside me. If not, he would hand over the various boxes and bags after obtaining my signature on his clipboard.

If there were wee ones about, he would stack packages in such a way as to hide any identifiable markings.  Or he would comment, "Looks like the gifts for the cousins have arrived" if they were too difficult to conceal. One time, because I wasn't at home when he arrived and the photo glued to every side of one rather large package would have divulged its contents, he found a way to tuck it behind the bushes on the side of the house.  He then placed several boxes around it as added protection and left me a note, explaining his subterfuge.

Thanks to Ted, this once young, harried mother of three, was able to secretly gather together the presents needed to create magic on Christmas morning.  

Friday Foto and Friday Fitness!

I just love the colors of these trees in the Autumn....

and sleepy Basset Boys, resting up for the Thanksgiving feast.....

Friday Fitness is back! 

Check out daughter #2's blog for some fabulous tips!

I'm going to be following several of them.

Heading out now to walk the Basset Boys and walk off some of yesterday's goodies!

Click here!

(not sure my "link" will work, so look on the right side of this page under "My Blog List" and click on "Mommy Musings" to read the tips!)

Thursday's thought for the day....

For each new morning with its light,
For rest and shelter of the night,
For health and food, for love and friends,
For everything Thy goodness sends.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Feeling extremely grateful this Thanksgiving Day for boundless blessings.

Wishing you and yours a Happy Thanksgiving, 

filled with wonderful memories 

and the love of family and friends.

Wednesday's wisdom....

A Picture Perfect Holiday

This may be the image that most of us conjure up in our minds when we think about Thanksgiving - the scene depicted by the artist Norman Rockwell

Our family gathering tomorrow on Thanksgiving will be quite small if what they say is true, that most family gatherings will consist of at least twenty-five people or more. Seated around our table will be the Englishman, our three daughters, two granddaughters and one son-in-law.  Our other son-in-law, unfortunately, will be at work.

Growing up, our family table was even smaller.  It was just my parents, brother, sister and me. I never knew any of my grandparents - they had all passed away before I was born.  Aunts, Uncles and cousins did not attend.  The truth is, until I was older and heard otherwise, I just assumed everyone spent Thanksgiving, and any other holidays, at their own homes with just their immediate family.  I didn't feel as though I was missing out - it was simply what I knew.

The holidays were no less special because it was just us.  We dressed up, my mother made a special, traditional dinner.  Thanksgiving, I always looked forward to watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade then viewing The March of the Wooden Soldiers on WPIX.  I  also loved the scent of apple pie and sausage stuffing floating from the kitchen.

I spent Thanksgiving seated in my mother's dining room for nearly my entire life.  The numbers grew as each of us married and had children.  Then they fell again, as happens when members begin new traditions.  The Englishman finally got to host it in our own home only a few years ago, following my mother's battle with some serious health issues. 

Life experiences, talking with others, and being a good observer have taught me that there are no "perfect" families or holidays. There's just my family.  No matter where we are, no matter how many or few are seated around the table, we will have a wonderful time.  No matter what the "picture" might look like.

Tip for a Tuesday....

Let the sun shine through!

Looking for an effective way to clean your windows and avoid those nasty streaks?

Try a solution of vinegar and water, adding slightly more vinegar than water, to a spray bottle.

Then, dig out some old bed sheets, cut into small rag sizes and use them to dry the windows.

Voila - streak free glass!

The Englishman was recently away on business.  When he travels, especially to locations in which there is, lets say, "added security" in the form of armed guards in the hotel lobby, I find it best to keep myself busy.

Very busy.

So last week I washed every window in my house. And mirror. And any surface with glass.

(It really did help to reduce my stress level!)

The vinegar/water and old sheet combo "worked a real treat", as they say in England. It's far less costly than purchasing traditional glass cleaner.  Using old sheets rather than paper towels not only saves money, it doesn't leave behind those annoying bits of fluff. Upon finishing my onslaught, I simply tossed the rags in the wash. They are now freshly laundered, folded and in my cupboard ready for the next business trip.

A Monday memory.....

Oh, the traffic!

Here we are again, just days before Thanksgiving.  What has come to mind are the many hours I spent while I was in college, then my daughters were in college, traveling "over the river and through the woods" to go - home.

No one tells you when you are filling in those dreaded college applications that it might be a good idea to actually consider the location of the school, what transportation links are available, and the number of colleges in a given area.

So it came as a bit of a shock the first time I tried to make my way home my first semester away.  Who knew there were literally hundreds of colleges in New England?  Who knew there was only one approach to the Mass Pike?  Who knew everyone would be leaving on Wednesday.  After lunch.  Who knew it could take more than six hours to get home?

Those bus stations can get pretty crowded, let me tell you.  And the buses?  After finally making my way to the George Washington Bridge bus terminal one time, I then had to take a "local" bus across the bridge to a spot where my Dad had agreed to meet me.  I managed to finally get a standing spot on one bus just as it was getting ready to depart. Problem was, I was all the way in the rear of the bus.  With a large old fashioned suitcase.  And I was the first stop off the bus.  I'm sure you can picture the um, understandably unhappy people who had to try and let me pass them.  Lets just say they were glad to see me get off.

I have a confession to make.  Based on that first experience, and a few other trying times, I did begin a pattern of skipping a few classes in order to leave early and beat the New England rush.  No, it wasn't right.  But I tried to justify it by telling everyone, "I'm from New Jersey" - to which people would often just nod and say, "Oh, well then, sure."  Professors?   I don't think they looked at it quite the same way.

When our daughters went off to college, they encountered similar challenges.  Sometimes rides could be caught with a friend.  We did a "switch"  a few times between daughter #1 in upstate New York and my nephew down this end at West Point.  And there were several times the Englishman and I each did a four hour up then back run.

So in addition to blessings too numerous to count this Thanksgiving,  I am most grateful that my little family all live in the same state and only one member has to drive just under two hours for our gathering.  

If you know someone looking at colleges, you might want to suggest they check the traffic reports on Wednesday, just so they're prepared.

Thursday's Thought for the Day....

"When I look back over my life, the times I was happiest was when I was doing for others."

                                                                               ~ Vincent R.

My father shared this thought with me two weeks before he passed away.  

I was speaking with friends earlier this week about service, volunteer work, helping others, and it brought my Dad's words back to me.

My Dad had a wonderful way of listening intently when people talked.  If you expressed an interest in a new subject, within days he would produce a book he had found on it for you or some research about it.  Not because you had asked, but because he thought you might like it.

He told our family a story one night which really touched my heart.  He worked in the City and would walk through the large terminal mid-town to catch the bus home in the evening.  One particular night, he happened upon a woman who looked in distress and was begging for money.  He told of how he sat down next to her, to actually speak with her and find out how she had ended up there in the terminal.  She spoke about her children and situation.  After listening to her tale, he gave her whatever cash he had in his wallet before resuming his trip home.  His kindness in recognizing this woman as a person, someone who deserved perhaps a little time as well as some money, spoke volumes, I thought, about the kind of man he was.

My Dad taught me that doing others doesn't always have to be a grand gesture or something monumental.  It can be as simple as a smile, holding a door, or looking someone in the eye and really listening to them when they speak.  To let them know, they matter.

I was so very blessed growing up because I always knew I mattered to him.  

And he was so right.  The times when I am doing things for others does bring me happiness - whether it's something for my family, crocheting scarves for soldiers, donating to a charity, or smiling at the grumpy check-out lady in the supermarket and really meaning it when I say, "Have a good day!"

Tip for a Tuesday....

Stash some cash....

Years ago I read a suggestion in one of Sarah Ban Breathnach's books about tucking a one hundred dollar bill in a pocket of your wallet for emergencies.

Why such a large amount?  Her reasoning was that if it were a large bill you wouldn't be inclined to spend it unless it truly was an emergency.

I actually did that for many years.  These days, since money seems a little tighter, I've switched to keeping two or three twenty dollar bills, folded up, and hidden in my wallet.

It gives me some peace of mind, knowing I have "backup" so to speak.  I have had to use it from time to time, when I have found myself short of cash or didn't make it to the bank as planned.

It's also something to think about, in light of the recent storm, when so many places lost power.  If the bank can't open, you can't get cash.  In some instances, people found they couldn't purchase gasoline with their credit cards - it was "cash only".

A small stash of money in the house might also be a good idea.  Just in case.

Provided of course, you remember where you've put it.

A Monday memory....

Giggles.....

There is no sound more glorious than that of children giggling.  One can't help but be caught up in the pure joy that emanates from their souls.

The Englishman recently showed me a montage of video clips of our girls when they were quite young.  What struck me the most, was that in every single instance, they were all grinning and giggling.

What a gift!

To be able to go back and peek once again at those moments.  

Those precious, precious moments, when they were completely themselves and filled with laughter.

And then yesterday, to sit Miss M in front of my computer and watch her face light up as she watched her "Mommy" and "Aunts".  To see her get caught up in their joy and to giggle aloud with them.

One particular clip captured our girls in their Grandma's kitchen, one Halloween night, bobbing for apples.  M sat enraptured,  then started cheering them on, shouting "You almost got it" and "Try again", with fits of giggles as she watched.

Then we went outside and created our own memories, just us two.

Hope this makes your day just a little bit better.

It most certainly made mine!

(fingers crossed it works - this is my first time posting a video!)

Friday Foto

The setting sun, on November 8th.

Thursday's Thought for the Day....

Goodness!  He is probably right - so I'm am taking steps to stop myself from telling my brain such silly things as "I can't remember" or "I couldn't possibly do that!"  From here on I will, as the song says,  "accentuate the positive".

Wednesday's wisdom....

Don't look too far down the road....

During difficult times, such as the storm we've just come through, serve as a reminder to me to try to remain only in today.  If I just look at what is happening in this day, and not try to look at the whole picture or stretch to see what may lie ahead, I can cope better.

In the past, when confronted with a looming financial crisis or an extended family member's health problems, I concentrated my thoughts on dealing with what was in front of me and not worrying about the possibilities that might be out there.

Having gratitude for even the smallest of blessings is a tool I utilize on a daily basis.  I've been waking up each morning for the past week with continuing gratitude for the basics of electricity, heat, gasoline in my car, and food in my refrigerator.  

Thankfully, my family and I have everything we need today.  What will happen with the Nor'easter, scheduled to descend upon us this afternoon, I have no idea.  But for today, all is well.

I sincerely hope and pray it is the same with you and yours.

Tip for a Tuesday....

Do it for yourself.

Do it for your country.

Do it for the millions who gave their lives, literally, so we can be free.

Do it for the thousands of women who also gave their lives or were imprisoned fighting for the right for women to vote.

JUST DO IT !

     "Deeds, not words"

 Emmiline Pankhurst  - Women's Social and Political Union - Leader of the British 

Suffragette Movement

And as my mother says, "If you don't vote, then I don't want to hear you complain about this country"

A Monday memory....

Long Beach Island

The Englishman and I met and fell in love on LBI.  That was way back in 1978.  It was the first time I had ever been on the Island.  I was spending time with my sister, who was renting with friends for a month.

Long Beach Island has a feel all its own.  There are no "boardwalks" to spoil the view.  I just loved it - from the sandy beach to the shops in Beach Haven.  My idea of heaven on Earth.

The Englishman and I liked it so much that we rented for a week the following two summers and eventually were blessed to be able to buy a house on the southern tip in Holgate.

We spent fifteen fabulous summers there.  I would take the girls and my mother down for the Easter break and sometimes, the week following the end of the school term.  We would all go down as a family for two weeks in August.  The rest of the time, we often rented the house out.

It was difficult for our family when we sold the house.  We all have such fond memories - the girls jumping the waves, putting on "shows", calling out for "sunset alerts", playing in the sand under the deck, or gazing at the ocean while sitting at the kitchen table. 

Following this devastating storm called Sandy, we have all happened upon photos of our former house.  It's heartbreaking to see the landscape so dramatically changed.

This is a former neighbor's house, identical to ours, before.

And this is the aftermath.  (Photo by Ryan Morill)

The dunes have been completely washed away.  Gone also are the entrances to the homes as well as the street and driveways leading up to them.

New Jerseyans are resilient people, however.  I'm confident they will clean up, rebuild homes and beaches, and create new memories for all of us who love being near the ocean. 

And while it is heartbreaking for people to lose or suffer significant damage to a vacation home, it is for the permanent residents and business owners that we most grieve.  May help reach them quickly, with much needed emotional as well as financial support.

We're back....

There are so many blessings for which I feel incredibly grateful, following the storm called "Sandy".

First, I am most grateful that all the members of my family are safe and sound.  And all the dogs too.

Power was restored after 48 hours. Thank you PSE&G workers!!

The fire, which was sparked as power returned by a downed power line in front of daughter #2's house, was put out and did not spread to her house.  Scary moments to say the least. 

Grateful that Barnegat Bay stopped one half inch short of coming into our future retirement home.  The mud it brought into the garage has been dealt with by the Englishman.  He also saw to the cutting down of the huge tree which was uprooted from our back yard and took rest upon our neighbor's rooftop. Grateful it didn't crash through her roof.

Grateful that extended family and friends are well and most have had power restored and little damage to their properties.

Continuing to pray for all those affected and all those trying to assist them.