Tip for a Tuesday....

"Stop shoulding on yourself!"

Dr. Jane Hathaway

Wise words from a very wise woman.

Dr. Hathaway frequently urged me, when I was struggling with life as a teenager,  to stop telling myself, "I should do this" or "I should be that."

Similar to when I would say to my mother, "But they are..." and she would immediately ask me, 

"Who are they?" and then, "Why do you have to do what they are doing?"

Also a wise woman.

Not "shoulding" on myself continues to be a work in progress, but one in which I make greater and greater strides with each passing year. 

Life is so short - better to do the things I want to - with joy and enthusiasm, than to do them halfheartedly or with resentment because I feel I should.

That's my tip.  Stop shoulding on yourself in the New Year.

Happy 2014!

May the new year bring good health, peace and prosperity to all!

A Monday Memory....

Christmas Eve 2008

We certainly didn't realize it then, but this was to be the last time my mother was able to come to my home to celebrate Christmas.  Following her stroke and cancer diagnosis late May of 2009, she spent the next several years safely tucked up in her own home for the holidays.

Four generations of women, gathered together.

Grandma, new Grandmom, daughters and granddaughter.

How blessed we were that day!

Fast forward......

Christmas Eve 2013

The memory of that previous photo op came flooding back to me as I sat on the couch last Tuesday night, C snuggled up on my lap, watching everyone opening gifts.  I whispered to my girls that if they were very quiet, perhaps they could all slip into place next to us.  My hope was that the Englishman could capture the moment before C became aware of my plan.  

Mission accomplished!

Though we missed my mother terribly that night, we still felt extremely blessed to all be together and to have such wonderful memories of her to remember and share with each other.

And to have added little Miss C to our group hug!

Thursday's Thought for the Day....

I found this on Pinterest.

 Similar to -

"If you change the way you look at things,

the things you look at change."

~ Wayne Dyer

I'm learning that changing my thoughts about a situation, can actually change the situation for me!

Oh, and 

Happy Boxing Day!

Wednesday's wisdom....

Have a very Merry Christmas!

Wishing you a day with loved ones, filled with memories to treasure.

Tip for a Tuesday....

Today's tip?

Accept that there is no "perfect"  

No perfect Christmas, Holiday, gift, family or meal.

My plan for today - to neither look for nor expect perfect.

To be open to letting go - to allow things to just happen.

To enjoy all aspects of my surroundings.

To be grateful for what I have, for what I've been spared and for all the memories I treasure of loved ones and Christmas pasts.

To just do the best that I can today and realize, deep down,

 that's enough.

A Monday Memory....

Cutting down the tree....

Spruce trees have a habit of growing, then rapidly outgrowing, their designated spots.  This was certainly the case with a spruce my parents had planted shortly after moving into our new house, when I was but a toddler. Several years later, they reluctantly decided the tree had to come down.  To soften the blow, they planned to take the top section off first and use it as a Christmas tree.  Clever, right?  

In theory....

So there we were - my Dad, sister and I - on what turned out to be a most challenging day of weather in mid December.  Sheets of rain quickly turned to ice, then snow.  Our fingers, numb with cold, didn't cooperate as easily as one would like.  The entire process seemed to move along at a snail's pace.

Climbing the ladder my sister and I had dragged from the garage, Dad found himself deep inside the branches of the massive tree.  Using a hand saw, he cut through the trunk as best he could.  When he felt he had made enough progress to allow the top to come down, he threaded a large piece of rope above the cut, securing it with several knots.

Meanwhile, the two teenagers under his command for this mission, were vacillating between impatience (we were freezing!) and fits of giggles.  Adding a degree of excitement to the afternoon, sirens began to wail, heralding the arrival of Santa Claus atop the local volunteer Fire Truck!

Amid much cheering, my sister and I quickly abandoned my Dad's side and ran off to the truck to get candy canes. 

The patience my Dad had with us that day was phenomenal!

When we returned to the job at hand, he then explained "the plan" about to take place. Our instructions were quite straight forward - with the end of the rope gathered in both our hands, we were to wait for his signal before doing anything more. Climbing back up the ladder, Dad then shouted down, "Now when I say when, I want you both to pull as hard as you can on the rope." 

Right. Got it.

Umm,  not quite. 

I'm still not clear if it was a premature tug on our part or just a flawed plan in general, but before we knew it, there was Dad, his head and shoulders barely sticking out from between the branches of the now toppled tree top.
We looked up in horror as he calmly said, "When."

Thankfully, he wasn't hurt. Though things hadn't exactly gone to plan, he was pleased that he had managed to cut the tree top off and get it down on the ground.
See how proudly he and his feeble assistant are smiling?

(My sister played photographer to capture the moment that day.)

And this is how the tree looked, resplendently dressed in tinsel, lights and ornaments, in the living room.

It was actually more massive than the photo leads you to believe, filling a large portion of the room.  It was far from the usual table top tree my parents had preferred in recent years.  Despite its odd shape and overbearing size, it felt extra special to us - having worked together to bring it in from our own property.

As I further recall, that particular Christmas Eve my sister and I sat on the couch and watched White Christmas on television for the first time after my parents had gone to bed.

Funny the things you can remember....

Thursday's Thought for the Day....

A Partridge in a Pear Tree

(revision by Sarah Ban Breathnach)

On the first day of Christmas, I gave to my true loves:

The gift of my Undivided Attention

On the second day of Christmas, I gave to my true loves:

The gift of Enthusiasm

On the third day of Christmas, I gave to my true loves:

The gift of Creative Energy

On the fourth day of Christmas, I gave to my true loves:

The gift of Simple Seasonal Pleasures

On the fifth day of Christmas, I gave to my true loves:

The gift of Tenderness

On the sixth day of Christmas, I gave to my true loves:

The gift of Good Cheer

On the seventh day of Christmas, I gave to my true loves:

The gift of Beauty

On the eighth day of Christmas, I gave to my true loves:

The gift of Communication

On the ninth day of Christmas, I gave to my true loves:

The gift of Surprise

On the tenth day of Christmas, I gave to my true loves:

The gift of Wonder

On the eleventh day of Christmas, I gave to my true loves:

The gift of Peaceful Surroundings

On the twelfth day of Christmas, I gave to my true loves:

The gift of Joy

from Simple Abundance, December 12

The intangible gifts are often the most needed and appreciated by those around me.

Better still, would be to give the listed gifts above on a daily basis, all year round.

Wednesday's wisdom....

Just pass me by....

Spending a fair amount of time on the roads lately, while growing older (and hopefully wiser) every day, have brought me to a few conclusions when it comes to driving.

To put it quite simply:

It's pretty wild out there!

So, what to do?

First, I need to remain calm.  OK, at least calm-er than I normally am.

Second, if someone is tailgating me, whenever possible, simply pull over and let them go by. 

I frequently do this, actually, on both local roads and the highway.  It really lessens my stress level - even those times when I utter a few words under my breath as the offender flies past me.

Third, be aware of ALL the cars around me and assume that yes, they are going to cross three lanes without using an indicator or looking before crossing those white lines.

Most importantly:

Beware of drivers who are weaving!

They are either under the influence or using their cell phone. 

Despite the laws banning their use, numerous drivers still insist on texting or chatting while behind the wheel.  These drivers are not fully in control of their vehicles, so I need to give them a wide berth.

(A few years ago, I waved my hands at a young man on his cell phone, who was driving erratically in a supermarket parking lot and came much too close to my car.  After exiting his vehicle, he apologized to me, then continued, "But everyone does it, right?  You do it?"

I emphatically and truthfully replied, "No.  I don't."

He seemed quite surprised by that.)

Calm, yet defensive driving, sans cell phone use.  That's my style.

Or at least what I'm working towards....

Tip for a Tuesday....

Mark your calendars....

Having a few minutes to spare before plunging into what I hope will be a most productive day,

 I've taken out the new calendar blotter I purchased for the coming New Year.  I will mark down the all the birthdays, as well as anniversaries and other important dates already floating round my head or on this year's calendar.  

With four family birthdays in January, it's never to early for me to make note of what is just over the horizon.   Becoming more "tech savvy," I've also started making notes on my "Reminders"  application, so as not to miss any future important events.

Seems the older I get, the more cues I need....

A Monday Memory....

Happy Birthday to you....

"Where are you going, my little one, little one
Where are you going, my baby, my own?
Turn around and you're two, turn around and you're four
Turn around and you're a young girl going out of my door...."

(lyrics by SONGWRITERSDONNARUMMA, PAOLO / MUNTER DAMIANI, GIOVANNI)

Sung by Kenny Loggins

Oh, how the years have flown! From toddler to Mrs.  

What pure joy you have brought to your father and I, as you've grown from those first steps to a confident, capable, outstanding young woman!

Wishing my "little one" a wonderful birthday 

and a year filled with happiness, good health and prosperity!!

Thursday's Thought for the Day....

"It isn't the size of the gift that matters,

but the size of the heart that gives it."

Eileen Elias Freeman

American Author

Something to consider while finishing up my shopping!

Wednesday's wisdom....

Light the candles!

This need to "save" things for special occasions or a future date is something I come by genetically.  It has been passed down to me from my mother.  The list of reasons she would give for this trait were completely understandable: having been raised in a difficult situation, as well as growing up during the Great Depression.  

For instance, if one of us gave her a new nightgown, she would admire it, then as she carefully folded it back into the box would say, "I'll save it in case I go to the hospital."  (In fairness, she did spend a lot of time in the hospital when we were kids.)  She would also apply "saving" things to other gifts or household items, using them only on special occasions.  

When I married and set up a household of my own, I often slipped into the same pattern.  I would find myself automatically saving things or using them only on holidays.  For the most part, I could see the wisdom in doing so - preserving things so they would last or feel special because they were only used a few times a year.

But I'm getting older now.  Much older. 

It makes more sense to me at this stage to use what I have and stop saving all of it.

Which is why I've been burning the candles we have.

Daily. 

In moving house, I've come across boxes and boxes of candles - pillars, tapers and votives.

Multiple sizes and scents.  I've been collecting them for years.

And now I'm burning them - using them - enjoying them.

I've also started using the cards and stationery I've been saving.  And wearing scarves and sweaters I've kept reserved for years for special occasions.  

Because as the ad used to say, "I'm worth it!"

And I also don't want my daughters to someday find these items unused 

and lament the fact that I never got to enjoy them.

Tip for a Tuesday.....

Do you love the smell of freshly cut pine boughs?

Then you will LOVE this limited edition dish soap from Meyer's!

Daughter #1 quickly grabbed a bottle and dropped it in our cart while we were shopping this past Sunday.  She then mentioned how fabulous the scent was and the fact that she was pleased to have found one of these bottles, as their appearance on the shelf is brief and only during the holidays.  

Well, since "Inquiring minds want to know" I asked for a whiff.

Sold!

As nice as the scent appeared in the store, I was thrilled when I put some in the sink last night.

The delightful Iowa piney aroma filled the room!

An easy, inexpensive way to increase that Christmas feeling around here!

A Monday Memory.....

Uh oh!!
During a cold December day, sometime in the mid 1960's, my family and I were in search of some Christmas presents in the shops located on the Main Street of the next town.  We were quite successful in finding many of the items each of us were seeking, in the very store in front of which we had parked.   So it was with huge smiles that we exited, eager to put our purchases in the car before heading off again for a couple of more items.  

Realizing that what was gathered in our arms would not fit comfortably in the back seat, my father directed my sister and I toward the trunk of the car.  Inserting the key, he popped the trunk lid up and.....

Behold! Two shiny new sleds dazzled our eyes!

                                                                (This is a photo from eBay of a similar Sears sled) 

The shouts which followed were not of joy, however.  They emitted from deep within my mother, who was horrified at what my father had, shall we say, "let out of the bag."

Let me explain.  Each Christmas, my siblings and I were always blessed to receive the items we requested on our wish list to Santa.  My mother enjoyed adding at least one "surprise" to the pile found beneath the tree for each of us.  This particular year, she was especially proud of having secured two new sleds for my sister and I - which were to be a SURPRISE.  Poor Dad, without realizing it, had ruined that for her.  Or so she thought.

My mother's reaction and disappointment was such that my sister and I truly believed she would send the sleds back.  I can honestly say that we were actually surprised that Christmas morning to find them under the tree.

We used them for many years thereafter, sledding down the hills of snow on the local golf course. 
(Which may be one of several reasons why that course erected a chain link fence not long after.)

Thursday's Thought for the Day....

"When we recall Christmas past, we usually

find that the simplest things - not the great occasions - 
give off the greatest glow of happiness."

 ~ Bob Hope

I have found that the "simplest things" often are the ones I remember most vividly.
Things like a trip to the drugstore,
 to help the little ones choose the gifts they wish to give to their siblings and other loved ones. 
Singing carols in the car on the way to school.
Snuggling up together on the couch to watch a holiday movie or television show.
Donning Christmas aprons and baking goodies to distribute to friends and family.

Then repeating these activities, year after year, for the sense of comfort and security they bring.

Simple
Memorable
Wonderful

A wise and wonderful man, that Bob Hope.  

An English born American comedian, vaudevillian, actor, singer, dancer and author, he appeared on Broadway and radio, as well as in the movies and television.

He unselfishly made 57 tours for the USO between the years 1941 and 1991 to entertain our Military members who were far from home during the Christmas season.

That alone makes him pretty special in my book.

A Monday Memory....

Do you hear what I hear......

This morning I put on some of my parents' old Christmas albums, which had been safely residing in their living room stereo for many years.  And with the first song, I felt transported back in time to the 1960's, a young girl once again, who was eagerly awaiting December 25th.

The album Christmas in New York  was always the first record to be placed on the turntable.  The voice of Kate Smith would fill the room as she sang "Silver Bells," officially marking the beginning of our family's Christmas season. My brother, sister and I would then make several trips up and down the basement stairs, carefully balancing the precious boxes which held our decorations.  The tabletop Christmas tree, with its miniature candle lights, which had belonged to my Dad's mother, would be carefully placed upon the hall dresser. The Nativity stable would be gently pulled from its orange cardboard box and placed on the stereo top.  Each figurine would then be gently unwrapped from their tissue paper cocoon in the brown square box and arranged just so within the stable.  The Wise Men would find themselves several feet away, in preparation for their long journey, which would unite them with the others on the Feast of the Epiphany, January 6th.

These memories came flooding back this morning while I set about placing some of the familiar decorations I've accumulated since I married.  Finding just the right spot for them in this new house is a bit challenging.  At the same time, those treasures of my childhood are also being placed in new surroundings this year.  But the sweet memories they evoke, of the family I grew up with or of the little family the Englishman, our three daughters and I became, remain unchanged.

Precious gifts - tucked away deep in my heart -

which I will draw on during the next several weeks, as well as for many years to come.

Thursday's Thought for the Day....

"As we pause to thank Him for the blessings of the past year, we must not forget to thank Him for the lessons we have learned through our difficult times. We are not to be thankful for just the pleasant, easy things, but ALL things." 

~ Millie Stamm

Wishing one and all a very Happy Thanksgiving -

filled with family, friends, and wonderful 

memories to last a lifetime.

Tip for a Tuesday....

"Polly, put the kettle on..."

The Englishman recently forwarded an article to me entitled "How a cup of tea makes you happier, healthier, and more productive" by Drake Baer.  I found it quite interesting, especially this paragraph:

"Beyond the caffeine, tea has another killer app, and this one is unique to the leaf: Theanine, which is an amino acid present in black and green tea, especially the matcha, gyokuro, and anji bai cha varieties. A review of the research suggests that theanine reduces anxiety and calms us because it increases the number of inhibitory neurotransmitters (which balance our moods out) and modulates serotonin and dopamine (which makes us feel good.)"

The article also points out that research suggests that health benefits include a lower risk of heart disease and stroke. 

Who knew? Perhaps the British people have been privy to this secret all along.  Sipping tea, whether from a mug or fine china cup, appears to offer far more benefits than just a mild jolt of caffeine. So put the kettle on and brew some tea.  Your body will thank you for it!

For more information, here is the link to the article. 
http://www.fastcompany.com/3021416/leadership-now/how-a-cup-of-tea-makes-you-happier-healthier-and-more-productive

Thursday's Thought for the Day....

This is certainly "food for thought" this morning....

* I found this on Pinterest while seeking a quote on gratitude.  I then went to the website listed - "We Choose Virtues" - ( http://we-choose-virtues.myshopify.com/)  and found a wonderful site filled with many interesting ideas, especially for Moms and Teachers.  You might want to check it out.

Tip for a Tuesday....

Jacquie Lawson

Forgive me if I've already told you about this wonderful site - but I believe it is worth repeating.

Below is a detailed description from the website, describing what is offered.

I've also noted the variety of "cards" available all year long, with a membership fee.

Below that is a copy of last years's "Advent Calendar."

If you are a Downton Abbey fan, this year's animated Advent Calendar will delight you!

My family, friends and I have found enormous pleasure in viewing these delightful cards and calendar.

In fact, granddaughter M is already playing several of the games and puzzles on this year's Advent calendar, currently loaded on her mother's computer.  She can't wait to "open the numbers" beginning the 1st of December!

*Please note - if you've already received the gift of the Advent calendar, you don't have to wait until December 1st to upload and use it.  Put it on your desktop today and start to enjoy it!

"Welcome to jacquielawson.com!

The classiest e-cards on the web

Back in the year 2000, Jacquie Lawson, an English artist living in the picturesque village of Lurgashall in Southern England, created an animated Christmas card featuring her dog and cats, and her 15th-century cottage, and sent it to a few friends for their amusement. Those friends sent the e-card to others, and within weeks Jacquie was inundated with requests from all over the world to design more e-cards. In February 2002 she teamed up with a few friends and family members to create jacquielawson.com.

Over the years the collection has grown to a current total of 262 e-cards, each one showing a degree of artistry and attention to detail rarely seen in the medium of e-cards. Even the music is composed and arranged specially for each card! We now have a range of birthday e-cards, Christmas e-cards, thank you e-cards, and so on, featuring dogs, cats, teddy bears,flowers, and many other subjects.

A modest yearly membership fee gives you access to the entire range of e-cards and allows you to send as many greetings as you like. You can even get a further discount by joining for two years!

We hope you enjoy browsing our e-cards, and if you're not already a member, we hope you will consider joining us and sharing Jacquie's delightful animations with your friends and family."

Thursday's Thought for the Day....

"You do build in darkness if you have faith.

When the light returns you have made of

yourself a fortress which is impregnable

to certain kinds of trouble; you may

even find yourself needed and sought

by others as a beacon in their dark."

~ Olga Rosmanith

(from the book believe)

A Monday memory....

We still remember....

It has been nearly ten years since I led a group of Third Graders through their letter writing assignments - letters written to my nephew and then future son-in-law, as well as a dozen or more of their friends, while they were serving our country in Iraq.  I received overwhelming support not only from my own students, but from my Principal, fellow Teachers, and all of the students in our school.  Having something concrete to do - sending letters and care packages - made those long months of holding our breaths as a family endurable.  It helped me to feel I could help these young men and women in some small way.

Though I don't personally know of anyone on active duty in the Middle East, there are still many ways that I can currently support our Service members.  One is through crocheting scarves, which I send on to Operation Gratitude. 
For information on how you can help:  http://www.operationgratitude.com/

And I pray often, for the Veterans and those currently serving, as well as for the families and friends who love and support them.  

Happy Veteran's Day!

Thank you for your service and may God bless you,

 now and forever! 

Friday Fotos....

I am by no means a photographer, but I wanted to share what I was able to capture the other night as the sun was starting its descent.                         How absolutely gorgeous is this?  

(If you look closely at the first photo, you can just about make out the sliver of the moon off to the left.)

Wishing everyone a peaceful weekend....

and GO ARMY  beat Western Kentucky!

Thursday's Thought for the Day....

 So let them go, let go of them. 

I tie no weights to my ankles.”

C. JoyBell C.

From her website:

"Meet the author

C. JoyBell C. is best known for her love of cake, especially that of the red velvet nature. She is also known for her poetry, prose, novel-writing and is famed for her philosophical writings and speeches, many of which have been quoted in various books by different authors and can also be appreciated as incorporated by many artists into their diverse pieces. Moreover, there are those who simply want to look at her pictures! She will say to you "Céad míle fáilte!" (A hundred thousand welcomes!) and "A viaxe continúa!" (The journey continues!)"

Wednesday's wisdom....

Bank it.....

If I've learned anything over the years, it's that I need to keep a personal sort of "bank" in which I store some very important supplies.

Things like: extra sleep, good nutrition, chats with girlfriends, watching the sunset and reading for an hour. Life will inevitably throw some unexpected curves my way.  If I have banked those items that are necessary to maintain my coping skills - and sanity - then I can better handle the surprises that come along.

Like a phone call (years ago) which instantly summons my spouse to a meeting - overseas - during a holiday weekend.  Or when one of my young daughters, happily playing with her toys just a few hours earlier, suddenly spikes a fever of 104 degrees.  Or recently, staying up all night, texting back and forth with my girls while watching the news, in order to lend support to my worried family members.

I no longer think of it as selfish to be sure I take time for a few wants, in addition to my basic needs. That way, when life gets turned upside down, I'm a little more prepared to handle it  - without wishing I could hop in my mini and motor off into the sunset......

Tip for a Tuesday.....

VOTE

If you haven't already done so, go and vote.

Now!

My mother used to say you had no absolutely no right to complain 

if you hadn't voted.

She was right.

And if you don't feel the need to do it for yourself, 

then do it for the thousands of men and women who literally 

gave their lives

so that you and I can exercise 

our Right to Vote!

It's the least we can do to say "thank you" for their ultimate sacrifice.

Go Vote!

I did.

Wednesday's wisdom....

Just do it!

Today I pushed myself to get to several things that have been nagging at me from the far reaches of my head.  You know, those little things you've been meaning to do but just haven't gotten to yet.  Simple tasks, really, which keep traveling from one "To Do" list to another.

So now I can cross them off the list.  And I feel all the better for having finally done them.

The trick will be, to stay on top of things now.......



(The Englishman and I are going to enjoy the last two nights of the Halloween lights.)

Tip for a Tuesday....

Hot Water Heaters....

     

Daughter #1 had some work done on a gas pipe in her house recently.  For safety reasons, the gas was shut off.  The problem arose when the gas was turned back on and the pilot light wouldn't ignite on her hot water heater.

Numerous failed attempts meant the gas company would need to come in.

I happened to be there when the young man arrived to sort out the problem.

One of the first questions he asked me was whether the filter had been cleaned recently.

"Filter?  There is a filter that needs to be cleaned?  You mean like cleaning the coils under my refrigerator?" I asked.

Oh yes, was his reply.  And with that he pulled out a circular plastic mesh filter, about two inches high, which was fitted around the base of the tank.

And it was full of dust.

Who knew?

Apparently, on some water heater models such a filter exists.  It is important to periodically remove and clean it.  Air needs to be able to flow through the combustion chamber and keep the pilot light lit.

So my tip?  When you have a few minutes, look to see the make and model of water heater you have. Then check online and see if you have a filter or any other component which should be checked and cleaned periodically.

Best to keep all systems running - especially with the cold weather setting in.

A Monday memory....

Halloween - 1975, 1976

Notice a theme?  Why yes, I do love Raggedy Ann!  First I was "Andy" - due to the fact that my then college roommate was far more petite than I. (My mother had made the red and white "smock top" which was quite the fashion necessity in the late '70's.)

I became "Ann" the following Halloween, simply due to the fact I had most of the costume - the hat, blouse, cummerbund, apron and skirt were the uniform I wore for my position as a Hostess at The Proud Popover Restaurant, Faneuil Hall, Boston.  My dear friend D, who I shared the apartment with, was kind enough to dress as "Andy" in her jean overalls.  (Also considered de rigueur in those days.)

Since then, my "costume" for Halloween usually consists of an orange sweatshirt with appropriate decoration or a sequined vest which sports pumpkins and scarecrows.  Oh, and Halloween socks!

While those items are not exactly a full on costume, I always made a point of wearing some sort of holiday clothes when my girls were growing up or I was teaching.  I think it made the day a little more fun for me as well as them.

And now with the wee ones, I will carry on the tradition.  Thanks to today's technology, we will be admiring each other's costumes this Halloween via "Facetime."  Can't wait to see them!

Thursday's Thought for the Day....

"The business of life is the acquisition of memories.  In the end, that's all you have."

Mr. Carson

Downtown Abbey - Series Four

So I'm making sure to continue to gather lovely memories, 
which will stay with me long after loved ones, and things, are gone.
Those memories truly are the most precious gifts!

Wednesday's wisdom....

Enough already.........

Remember that campaign several years ago, advising young people to "Just Say No" to drugs?

I have a suggestion for a new campaign.

One to stop the bullying that is rampant in this country, from four year olds to senior citizens.

"KNOCK IT OFF!"

That was an expression my mother used years ago when she wanted my siblings and I to stop a behavior she found unacceptable.

Clear, concise, and to the point.

Maybe it's time to stop analyzing why certain kids are bullied.  Time to stop telling the victims they need to be stronger or more assertive.

Let's simply tell the bullies to

"Knock it off!"

Years ago, when one of my kids was being bullied by a female student seven years her senior, I spoke to her First Grade Teacher while in the lunchroom.

She immediately called over the bully and after a few minutes of discussion told her to "just stop it."

And you know what? It worked!

The Eighth Grade student stopped it.  She had been called out on her bad behavior, told it was unacceptable and it needed to stop.  End of discussion.

"Bullying," like experimenting with drugs and alcohol is not some "Rite of passage" all kids need to experiment with.

It's cruel and completely unnecessary.

Perhaps the real problem is that we need to convince the parents of the bullies, before we can convince the bullies themselves that everyone needs to....

KNOCK IT OFF!

A Monday memory....

Five little pumpkins....

While discussing Halloween with my granddaughters last week during a visit, I suddenly started to sing a rhyme I had been taught, probably fifty(!) years ago.  

You should have seen the look of surprise on M's face!  

"Grandmom, you know that song?"

"Oh yes," I replied.  "I learned that song when I was in the same school you go to now."

M isn't always in favor of me singing, but she made an exception in this case, and together we sang the entire song. 

(I admit, I may have missed a word or two.  It has been a long time...)

Some things do stand the test of time, I'm happy to say.

Nursery rhymes and holiday songs are among the nicest, I think.

For those of you who are not familiar with it, here are the lyrics:

Five little pumpkins sitting on a gate.

The first one said, "oh my it's getting late."

The second one said, "there are witches in the air."

The third one said, "but we don't care!"

The fourth one said, "let's run and run and run."

The fifth one said, "I'm ready for some fun!"

OOOhh OOOhh went the wind

And out went the lights

And the five little pumpkins rolled out of sight